Rest In Peace Darling Matilda

 

My love is with you

My love is with you

I’m so sorry to tell everyone that Matilda died today at 5pm. She had a happy day until she somehow put her foot down the wrong way and her humerus fractured due to  osteosarcoma. With greyhounds, even a little bit of compromised bone from cancer can cause a fracture at the slightest provocation. This is what happened. At thirteen and a half, with unsteady limbs in general, amputation wasn’t an option. A cancerous bone cannot be repaired, and osteosarcoma is excruciatingly painful. She was given pain meds almost immediately, and x-rayed. Many of her friends came to sit with her to speak to her, thank her, give her love and send her off. One of her favorite people besides me, Rafaela, came to be with us as she began her journey to wherever it is that she will go. I love the rainbow bridge. I hope it is something like that.

Of course, I am splitting in two emotionally. I think this has been the hardest loss out of all the beautiful, loving dogs I’ve been privileged to have in my life. All these months that she had Lymphoma, and then went into remission have been difficult. One always fears the worst when the pup has strange symptoms. Underlying everything in my life has been the constant buzz-hum of worry.  Worry about and love for  Matilda have been the heartbeats of my life. The reality of her absence is confusing, as death always is at first.  I want to keep her spirit alive, and will keep her blog going.

After all, it is Matilda’s Journey. The conversation continues, and we are all a part of her journey. She will stay with me and you, even if you have never met her. Many of you have sensed her  amazing, healing, gentle, accepting presence. I will keep writing about her, and when I feel her presence, you will know about it. There will not be any new pictures of her, but I will post many pictures of her that I may not have posted before. Even blurry ones. And sometime I may start a foundation, Matilda’s Journey, to raise money to help people pay for their dogs’ cancer treatment.

Her siblings will also be treading along Matilda’s Journey. Livvie and Kessie seem a little lonely for her already.

44 thoughts on “Rest In Peace Darling Matilda

  1. Erin Omwake says:

    Oh, Terry, I am so very sorry to hear this. Matilda is most certainly running free at the Rainbow Bridge. Thank you for being such a great mom to her. Thinking of you, Livvie, and Kessie.

  2. lauren says:

    Thank you miss Tillie for all the joy you brought us, and all your gentle, magical unicorn-dog love. You will be so missed here on earth. Thank you Terry for sharing Tillie with us here (and in person for some :) ) < 3

  3. Mary Noll says:

    I am so very sorry for your loss. We will light a candle for her journey to Rainbow Bridge.
    What a wonderful and courageous dog.

  4. rafaela shira anshel says:

    I have had the honor of knowing and loving Mathilda (Tillie) Cramer. The first day I met her she kissed me on my lips. She was (and in my heart [our hearts]) a truly, gentle, selfless, loving being. She she loved her brother kessie and sister livvie and was playful with them. She loved people.. all people… and personally am blessed to know she loved me too and blessed that I loved and will always love her. Mathilde was one of the most gentle souls of any being I ever have known and that includes human animals. Yes, as Terry, her primary human companion says, she is continuing her journey onto the rainbow bridge… today was her passage to what is next in her journey. It was an honor (and much needed) that I was with her today as she moved on …. I loved (love) her so very much and am grateful for my dear Terry for sharing her beautiful Tillie with me, so I can give and receive love from dear Mathilde Cramer. May her memory be for a blessing….. all my love…..

  5. Oh so very sorry. I am sharing your heartache. It’s been a pleasure to get to know you and Tilly since finding you recently. Tilly is a shining example to us all as are you. I’m sure Tilly will rest in peace secure in the knowledge that you will love her forever.

    • Terry Cramer says:

      Thank you so much. I am going to keep her spirit alive by continuing to blog about her and the things that I think she stands for. So stay tuned. Of course, the immediate future will be grieving her.

  6. Joanna says:

    Matilda’s work here on earth is completed, but left for you to carry on. Yes, there IS a Rainbow Bridge for God doesn’t create goodness and then leave it to be destroyed. It lives forever. If you don’t quite believe it now, you are in for a joyful surprise when your work is done. Don’t be surprised if she continues to affect your work here either… it will happen when you least expect it.

  7. Linda Bagley says:

    I am so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you and my candle is lit for Matilda. She truly has left her paw print on your heart and her memory will live forever within you.

  8. emma says:

    Oh no! Mom and I are so sad for you and your loss. We were shocked to read this as it was so sudden. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

    • Terry Cramer says:

      Thank you Emma and Emma’s mommy. This was kind of sudden, although she had begun limping last Saturday, and had a suspicious-looking X-ray of her humerus on Wednesday. Monday we were going to begin attempting to find out what was going on. You will be happy to know that she was having a good time almost right up to the end.

  9. Lee says:

    When I read your last post saying a suspicious spot had showed on an x-ray I prayer for Matilda. My last scot which I called my best and brightest had osteosarcoma of his rear leg and like Matilda a break came. I have not followed you blog long, but I feel your pain. Sending blessing your way.
    Sweet William The Scot

    • Terry Cramer says:

      Thank you so much Lee and Sweet William. We have you enjoyed your comments, and your blog. We are going to continue Matilda’s Journey, because, in many ways, she was not done, and we know journeys continue long after death in one way or another. I hope you will keep following, and see what Matilda will cook up for us from her spiritual abode.

  10. Diana says:

    I have been reading up on this story for a long time now and I am so sorry. She seemed to be wonderful in everyway. My heart goes out to you.

  11. Angel Roeder says:

    Terry – I was with Erin Omwake when we met you at BlogPaws. I have quietly been following Matilda’s Journey since then. I am so sorry for your loss, but her journey now will be free of pain. Thank you for sharing Matilda with us. I wish I could have met her in person.

  12. Mary Noll says:

    Clown (We call Faith) in KS. wants to personally thank Matilda and her Mom for featuring her on your lovely blog. Matilda was always thinking of others.

    • Terry Cramer says:

      We thank Faith (Clown) for her wishes. I think on Wednesday I will get back into it, and feature the next wonderful Cairn. Kessie and Livvie, Matilda’s siblings are also terriers, but they are Rat Terriers.

      Yes, Matilda was actually always thinking of others. She was extremely compassionate. I wish everyone could have met her.

  13. I am at a loss for words this morning, and my eyes are filled with tears. My heart breaks for you for Matilda’s passing. Over the months that I have gotten to know you and her, you have both etched very special places in my heart. I knew that Matilda’s time probably wouldn’t be too far off, but I didn’t expect it to be so sudden.
    Matilda, you might have been many states away, and I may have never met you in person, but you held a dear, dear place in my heart. I felt connected to you even though I had never met you. I know you had that effect on a lot of people. Now it’s time for you to run free and spread your sweetness at the Bridge.
    Many hugs, prayers, and healing thoughts to you, Terry. Hug Livvie and Kes for me too.

    • Terry Cramer says:

      Oh Pam, thank you so much for your beautiful words. We all thought that we would have a little more time left with Matilda. The unexpected arrival of osteosarcoma put a wrench in our plans. Matilda too seemed surprised. She’d been feeling great, and having a lot of fun that day. She seemed to be in disbelief that her leg didn’t work, looking up at me with her big eyes, seeming to ask for help. Her story will continue. I have so much more to say about her and what she stands for.

  14. Oh Terry, my heart is just breaking. I am so deeply sorry. I am shocked.
    I also met you at BlogPaws and have been following Matilda’s Journey ever since, I don’t always comment but I am here.
    My heart is just breaking.
    Matilda and you were blessed to share each other’s lives.
    Sending you much love and sympathy
    Caren and Dakota

  15. Mom and I are so sorry that Matilda is gone! We both think she was lucky to find a forever home with so many people who loved and cherished her. Thank you for keeping her blog going in her memory. Purrs from me and hugs from Mom.

  16. Dogs N Pawz says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss. My heart is breaking for you. May Matilda run fast and forever free. RIP sweet, sweet Matilda.

  17. […] news that Matilda the Greyhound, of Matilda’s Journey, made her way to the Rainbow Bridge on Saturday, October 5th. […]

  18. Donna says:

    I am so very sorry to hear about Matilda’s passing. Good to know that you and Matilda were surrounded by loved ones, and I think it is noble of you to have written such an eloquent post to share this sad news, and to plan to continue blogging about Matilda. My heart goes out to you at this difficult time, and you are in my thoughts.

  19. houndstooth says:

    Oh no! I’m so sorry! When we found out that Blue had osteo this summer, it was such a sucker punch, and we didn’t have any time to think about what to do, because the bone was already stress fracturing. Osteo is such a horrible thief of a disease and I’m so sorry that you had to go through it, too. Please know that we are thinking about you right now, and sending comforting thoughts your way.

  20. Karen H says:

    Our hearts go out to you… it’s always hard when your beloved pet, your fur-kid, has been with you so long, been such a huge part of your life so long. We choose to believe there is a Rainbow Bridge… I don’t think I could take losing my animals, my bestest friends, if I didn’t know I’d see them again, later, when my time comes. Deepest sympathies for your loss. Matilda was very special, and your life was surely enriched for having had her.

  21. Terry Cramer says:

    Thank you so much. It feels hopeful when so many people are so supportive and have been there.

  22. We are so sorry to read this. We’re behind in news and only learned of Matilda’s passing today. She was doing well when she did a meet & greet with us in September. Things change so quickly. Hugs, purrs and pawtaps in Matilda’s memory..

  23. We are SO sorry to hear about your loss. We had an amazing brindle girl in our life, my heart dog, with whom we battled osteosarcoma for almost a year and of course as all of these things end, so did Girly Girl’s journey. Like you I really really hope there is a rainbow bridge. That is where I want my girl and Matilda to be.

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